Math

Can everything be divided into the least common denominator? If so then why is it still necessary to search for answers to questions that we should be able to calculate ourselves...why did it end? Why now? What went wrong? Why always me?

Every time I turn around and I found myself in the same place. A pretty girl, who always finds relationships just out of touch, something is always slightly out of sync and optimisms are held just so slightly out of reach. Continuing with the least common denomimator theory, the bottom line still remains me. I am always at the end of the trail standing as if I was duped and full heartily didn't see it coming. Just as I am ready to go again, open up one more time I turn around and I find myself right back completely turned around empty handed surprised one mroe time. My greatest fear is not ending up alone, its spinning around one last time with no optimism and no hope to go around again.

I want so badly to spin around and have someone ready to spin with me. Its not that a love will stop your spinning confusing life but when you find yourself so dizzy afraid to be left behind, to be able to turn and look next to you at someone that will fall with you.

I found myself yet again blindsided and overwhelmed by that sinking sensation in my stomach. This time was different, it was worse, the pain comes from fully offering myself to someone and them taking what they want while leaving behind the rest of me. Its so exhausting yet exhilarating to strip yourself down and leave yourself defenseless without any form of armor or pessimism because this time O this time is real. I am impressed with my ability to continuously take blow after blow and continue spinnign with an open heart and open mind. Though some would dubb this blind romanticism, its what I believe to be teh driving force of life. Whats life without confusion, laughter, and tears.